tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36086324262498436832024-03-21T00:42:57.931-07:00Zebra PsychologyStories, Lessons, Advice, and Hilarity from a small town Zebra with an attitude and a highly suspect degree in psychology (quite possibly purchased from a shady internet website for $12.)
Sharonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01787533894158910251noreply@blogger.comBlogger9125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3608632426249843683.post-32968069931662846642016-03-27T02:10:00.000-07:002016-03-27T02:10:00.391-07:00Not Like You<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
<o:DocumentProperties>
<o:Version>15.00</o:Version>
</o:DocumentProperties>
<o:OfficeDocumentSettings>
<o:AllowPNG/>
</o:OfficeDocumentSettings>
</xml><![endif]--><br />
<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
<w:WordDocument>
<w:View>Normal</w:View>
<w:Zoom>0</w:Zoom>
<w:TrackMoves/>
<w:TrackFormatting/>
<w:PunctuationKerning/>
<w:ValidateAgainstSchemas/>
<w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>false</w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>
<w:IgnoreMixedContent>false</w:IgnoreMixedContent>
<w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>false</w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>
<w:DoNotPromoteQF/>
<w:LidThemeOther>EN-US</w:LidThemeOther>
<w:LidThemeAsian>X-NONE</w:LidThemeAsian>
<w:LidThemeComplexScript>X-NONE</w:LidThemeComplexScript>
<w:Compatibility>
<w:BreakWrappedTables/>
<w:SnapToGridInCell/>
<w:WrapTextWithPunct/>
<w:UseAsianBreakRules/>
<w:DontGrowAutofit/>
<w:SplitPgBreakAndParaMark/>
<w:EnableOpenTypeKerning/>
<w:DontFlipMirrorIndents/>
<w:OverrideTableStyleHps/>
</w:Compatibility>
<m:mathPr>
<m:mathFont m:val="Cambria Math"/>
<m:brkBin m:val="before"/>
<m:brkBinSub m:val="--"/>
<m:smallFrac m:val="off"/>
<m:dispDef/>
<m:lMargin m:val="0"/>
<m:rMargin m:val="0"/>
<m:defJc m:val="centerGroup"/>
<m:wrapIndent m:val="1440"/>
<m:intLim m:val="subSup"/>
<m:naryLim m:val="undOvr"/>
</m:mathPr></w:WordDocument>
</xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
<w:LatentStyles DefLockedState="false" DefUnhideWhenUsed="false"
DefSemiHidden="false" DefQFormat="false" DefPriority="99"
LatentStyleCount="371">
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="0" QFormat="true" Name="Normal"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" SemiHidden="true"
UnhideWhenUsed="true" QFormat="true" Name="heading 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" SemiHidden="true"
UnhideWhenUsed="true" QFormat="true" Name="heading 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" SemiHidden="true"
UnhideWhenUsed="true" QFormat="true" Name="heading 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" SemiHidden="true"
UnhideWhenUsed="true" QFormat="true" Name="heading 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" SemiHidden="true"
UnhideWhenUsed="true" QFormat="true" Name="heading 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" SemiHidden="true"
UnhideWhenUsed="true" QFormat="true" Name="heading 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" SemiHidden="true"
UnhideWhenUsed="true" QFormat="true" Name="heading 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" SemiHidden="true"
UnhideWhenUsed="true" QFormat="true" Name="heading 9"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="index 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="index 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="index 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="index 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="index 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="index 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="index 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="index 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="index 9"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true"
UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="toc 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true"
UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="toc 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true"
UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="toc 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true"
UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="toc 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true"
UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="toc 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true"
UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="toc 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true"
UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="toc 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true"
UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="toc 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true"
UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="toc 9"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Normal Indent"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="footnote text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="annotation text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="header"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="footer"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="index heading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="35" SemiHidden="true"
UnhideWhenUsed="true" QFormat="true" Name="caption"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="table of figures"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="envelope address"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="envelope return"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="footnote reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="annotation reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="line number"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="page number"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="endnote reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="endnote text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="table of authorities"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="macro"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="toa heading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Bullet"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Number"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Bullet 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Bullet 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Bullet 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Bullet 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Number 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Number 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Number 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Number 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="10" QFormat="true" Name="Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Closing"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Signature"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" SemiHidden="true"
UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Default Paragraph Font"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text Indent"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Continue"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Continue 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Continue 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Continue 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Continue 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Message Header"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="11" QFormat="true" Name="Subtitle"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Salutation"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Date"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text First Indent"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text First Indent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Note Heading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text Indent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text Indent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Block Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Hyperlink"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="FollowedHyperlink"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="22" QFormat="true" Name="Strong"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="20" QFormat="true" Name="Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Document Map"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Plain Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="E-mail Signature"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Top of Form"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Bottom of Form"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Normal (Web)"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Acronym"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Address"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Cite"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Code"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Definition"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Keyboard"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Preformatted"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Sample"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Typewriter"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Variable"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Normal Table"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="annotation subject"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="No List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Outline List 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Outline List 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Outline List 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Simple 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Simple 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Simple 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Classic 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Classic 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Classic 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Classic 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Colorful 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Colorful 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Colorful 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Columns 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Columns 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Columns 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Columns 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Columns 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table 3D effects 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table 3D effects 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table 3D effects 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Contemporary"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Elegant"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Professional"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Subtle 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Subtle 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Web 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Web 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Web 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Balloon Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="Table Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Theme"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" Name="Placeholder Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" QFormat="true" Name="No Spacing"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" Name="Revision"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="34" QFormat="true"
Name="List Paragraph"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="29" QFormat="true" Name="Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="30" QFormat="true"
Name="Intense Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="19" QFormat="true"
Name="Subtle Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="21" QFormat="true"
Name="Intense Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="31" QFormat="true"
Name="Subtle Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="32" QFormat="true"
Name="Intense Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="33" QFormat="true" Name="Book Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="37" SemiHidden="true"
UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Bibliography"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true"
UnhideWhenUsed="true" QFormat="true" Name="TOC Heading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="41" Name="Plain Table 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="42" Name="Plain Table 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="43" Name="Plain Table 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="44" Name="Plain Table 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="45" Name="Plain Table 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="40" Name="Grid Table Light"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46" Name="Grid Table 1 Light"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51" Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52" Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46" Name="List Table 1 Light"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="List Table 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="List Table 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="List Table 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="List Table 5 Dark"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51" Name="List Table 6 Colorful"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52" Name="List Table 7 Colorful"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="List Table 1 Light Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="List Table 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="List Table 3 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="List Table 4 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="List Table 5 Dark Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="List Table 6 Colorful Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="List Table 7 Colorful Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="List Table 1 Light Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="List Table 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="List Table 3 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="List Table 4 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="List Table 5 Dark Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="List Table 6 Colorful Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="List Table 7 Colorful Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="List Table 1 Light Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="List Table 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="List Table 3 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="List Table 4 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="List Table 5 Dark Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="List Table 6 Colorful Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="List Table 7 Colorful Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="List Table 1 Light Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="List Table 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="List Table 3 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="List Table 4 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="List Table 5 Dark Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="List Table 6 Colorful Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="List Table 7 Colorful Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="List Table 1 Light Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="List Table 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="List Table 3 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="List Table 4 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="List Table 5 Dark Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="List Table 6 Colorful Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="List Table 7 Colorful Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="List Table 1 Light Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="List Table 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="List Table 3 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="List Table 4 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="List Table 5 Dark Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="List Table 6 Colorful Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="List Table 7 Colorful Accent 6"/>
</w:LatentStyles>
</xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 10]>
<style>
/* Style Definitions */
table.MsoNormalTable
{mso-style-name:"Table Normal";
mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0;
mso-tstyle-colband-size:0;
mso-style-noshow:yes;
mso-style-priority:99;
mso-style-parent:"";
mso-padding-alt:0in 5.4pt 0in 5.4pt;
mso-para-margin-top:0in;
mso-para-margin-right:0in;
mso-para-margin-bottom:8.0pt;
mso-para-margin-left:0in;
line-height:107%;
mso-pagination:widow-orphan;
font-size:11.0pt;
font-family:"Calibri",sans-serif;
mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri;
mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri;
mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;}
</style>
<![endif]-->
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
I love to be surrounded by old things… antiques… movies…
music… people.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I always have.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And when I think of antiques, I never ever
picture a beautifully restored item that has been painstakingly brought back to
some semblance of its original brand newness.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>To me, while absolutely beautiful, it’s no different from buying a brand
new freshly built piece of furniture at the nearest furniture warehouse even if
it is far superior in quality.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How
something is pieced together doesn’t interest me nearly as much as how it got
to be where it is at that moment*I* first saw it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How many people have loved it, and used it,
and lived near it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How did it find its
way to me?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This is true for antique
furniture, and it’s true for people in my life.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I never have thought it important to be aware of the quality of
someone’s physical self… such as how they measure up by the standards of a
society that continually changes the way those things are measured.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Nor have I thought it important to know how someone
was raised before deciding whether or not I wanted to know who they are the
moment I first met them.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I know that my inability to find certain things important
used to, and probably still does drive my parents crazy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ve been aware of this for most of my
life.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ve never had a difficult time
existing in any way because of this knowledge… it didn’t make growing up
difficult for me at all.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It didn’t make
it necessary for me to have counseling, or therapy of any sort or at any time
in my life, and I’ve never felt inferior because of the fact that I didn’t “get
it”… although I’m certain Mom and Dad didn’t find it so easy to live with my
lack of concern for some things.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
understand that their frustration with me is because they never wanted me to be
hurt or disappointed, or unable to take care of myself in a world where all of
those things seem to matter.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But by now
they must know that I’ll never be that “responsible”, “discerning”, “people
smart” person that they could never get me to be.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And I just want them to know that it’s
okay.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m not going to hell because I’m
not a financially responsible human.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m
not going to die lonely, and sick in a gutter somewhere because I gave the
shirt off my back to someone who needed it without realizing that I probably
could have used it myself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I don’t
pretend to think I’m in any way better than anyone else because of the way I
am.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I just get tired of being told that
I “HAVE TO LEARN”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Because I haven’t
learned in 50 years to be that person.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I’ve tried.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>For many years I
tried because I thought there was something wrong with me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I tried because I hated disappointing the
people who wanted me to be different.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
tried because I was told that was how I should be.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And I tried because I knew you had no respect
for anyone who didn’t discipline and force themselves to be something even if
it didn’t come naturally to them.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Somewhere along the way I knew that it didn’t matter how hard I tried.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Not only was I ill equipped to be “that
person”, I saw nothing wrong with the person I am.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am so in love with the differences, and
unique souls and spirits of my friends and loved ones I can’t imagine living in
a world where everyone was the same.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>They felt the same things, believe the same ideas, live the same lives,
have the same friends, the same jobs, the same desires and do the same things
with the same amount of free time that everyone else has because they did what
someone else decided they should do.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We
weren’t created the same way for reasons that seem mightier, and more important
than any concern I’ve ever had about not being like everyone else.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We weren’t given the same tools and the same
brain so as to have the same thoughts and the same needs as the rest of those
who we share this planet with. We all somehow ended up with certain qualities
that keep anyone or anything else EVER from being just like us… so how is it,
or can it be wrong to be so…. Different? </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I suppose this sounds like a laundry list of excuses and
reasons why I’m not that mature adult that I “should” be by now, and I’m okay
with that too.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I AM pretty dang good at
one thing, and that would be putting feelings and ideas into words that make
sense to people…. So that is how I tend to process most everything that
marinates longer than 24 hours in my brain… I write.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It is my hope that anyone who finds
themselves frustrated and disappointed in a loved one because they just won’t
be more responsible with money or they just won’t grow up will take a moment
and think about the things that person DOES do in a responsible way. Do they
share their time? Their talents? Their possessions?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Are
they good people? Do they listen? Do they go out of their way to help you or
anyone in need? Would they be the kind of person you would be proud of if money
didn’t exist?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If they would, then why
does it matter? Are you tired of helping them?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>That’s legitimate.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I get
that.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They’re probably tired of helping
you sometimes too, but they still do it, regardless of the cost.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Their time is worth something, right? Their
talent might be worth something too… but they don’t think of those things, they
think of you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And how you’re not very
good at this particular thing you need help with, and they want to save you
frustration and money and they help you even if they have something else they
should be doing… every single time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Not all of your children, your friends, your friend’s
children, and your children’s friends are going to be like you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Not all of them want to be.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And not all of them are going to miraculously
“grow up” one day and finally be like you either.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And I’ll let you in on a little secret… some
of them are okay with that.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They’re
fine, despite the fact that they know you disapprove, they know you’re
disappointed, they know they are being judged, and they realize you hold it
against them sometimes… maybe constantly.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>And they still love you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They
still hope you understand that their shortcoming doesn’t make them bad… and
some of them know that you don’t get it, and never will.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It affects who they are because they don’t
want to disappoint you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It affects how
they see themselves.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It affects their
ability to feel good enough in most situations in life.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It affects their wellbeing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>THAT is a damn shame.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Please… for the love of humanity reevaluate
how important it is for someone you love to be like you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In the grand scheme of everything, exactly
how important is it going to be for you to stand before your creator and
explain your disappointment in someone who wasn’t good enough because of their
inability to be just like you? </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Please don’t mistake this for my proclamation that a
financially irresponsible person is somehow better than anyone else because
they might have other priorities in life… or that I’m trying to give excuses to
myself or others like me for the things that drive people like you crazy… just
take it for what it is… another way to see something… a different perspective
to help you understand how someone could “be that way”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The truth is there’s no room in this life
for holding back love for any reason.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We
need all the love we can get to help each other through, and nothing… not a
savings account, not a nest egg, not an excellent credit rating and not a 100%
on time payment record is going to get us into happily ever after.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Nothing but the place inside of us containing
love, and the places outside of us that we gave it away can do that.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Think about it! <span style="font-family: Wingdings; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-char-type: symbol; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-symbol-font-family: Wingdings;"><span style="mso-char-type: symbol; mso-symbol-font-family: Wingdings;"></span></span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
Sharonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01787533894158910251noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3608632426249843683.post-78243864141329998232015-12-06T21:20:00.002-08:002015-12-06T21:22:55.731-08:00Stupid December Here I am, smack dab in the middle of the craziest, busiest time of my life, and I almost didn't recognize the dark cloud. I find myself going through all the self examination that a fabulous arm chair psychologist zebra would do without thinking.... let's see... I don't write much anymore, so I'm not having writer's block... I take pictures several times a week and they're so awesome for the most part that I certainly can't claim any kind of creative malfunction... Christmas has puked everywhere I look.... oh. Christmas. It's December. <br />
<br />
It's been so long since I've let December grind on my nerves to the point that I needed to write... so long in fact, that I might have thought I didn't hate December anymore.... until this past week. Turns out I still hate December, and yes, despite how many times I've written the date this past week, I wasn't ready for it. Not at all.<br />
I won't bore you all with why... you've heard it all before. Usually when I finally acknowledge what is eating me up I can get through it easier, but I can't for the life of me understand why I don't EVER see it coming. So... sorry about being an asshole. Okay, not really. But I'm sorry for being an emotional mess. I'm on my way out of it. By the time new years gets here I'll have taken my December angst out on some poor unsuspecting message board somewhere enough times that I'll be good for another year.<br />
<br />
I miss you Rocky. I know I know I know.... you don't ever get over it, you get through it. So Here's to getting through... anybody with me? Cheers! Sharonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01787533894158910251noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3608632426249843683.post-83579844306706041652014-05-17T13:32:00.002-07:002014-05-17T13:32:40.750-07:00A Lesson about Shit Sandwiches <br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEheGh7D5ABhxVlkLIfYRgc33nkBIBYSYv4YWoDuTgWOq4L6SM6gAskJqtucvEx3Q3vrbTY2dpfTGPGPS2tR5HvxUV2Dl3MU8p5F_Y6iDItyRJTLrvJEC_bI1y-ANPsOlRE1CxKQxZ3WRTaX/s1600/laughing-zebra.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEheGh7D5ABhxVlkLIfYRgc33nkBIBYSYv4YWoDuTgWOq4L6SM6gAskJqtucvEx3Q3vrbTY2dpfTGPGPS2tR5HvxUV2Dl3MU8p5F_Y6iDItyRJTLrvJEC_bI1y-ANPsOlRE1CxKQxZ3WRTaX/s1600/laughing-zebra.jpg" height="320" width="227" /></a></div>
<br />
Have you ever had a certain piece of advice stick with you without really being sure why? I can think of a couple different things that were more cliche than anything, and I'm not even sure where I may have heard them the first time. But I do have this one... particularly insightful piece of advice that my brother gave me more than a year ago, and I can't forget it. I told him awhile back that it stuck with me and he kind of chuckled, but in the past two days the advice has proven to be perfect in both application, and hilarity value (very important when you're dealing with fun haters and not-so-bright people) and I figured someone else might benefit from this wisdom. <br />
<br />
<h2 style="text-align: center;">
<span style="color: blue;"><b>WARNING: If the word "shit" bothers you, you'll want to go ahead and walk away now! :) </b></span></h2>
<br />
Okay here we go:<br />
<br />
Advice from the bro:<br />
<br />
"Okay, you keep eating the shit sandwiches she makes for you so what do you expect?" <br />
<br />
I was like... "uhhhh what?" <br />
<br />
And he said: "Yeah, every day she makes you at least one shit sandwich, and you look at it, think about it, talk about it complain about it, and then... you eat it." <br />
<br />
"So tomorrow, or even later today, she's going to make you another shit sandwich, and based on what I've seen so far, you're probably going to eat it again." <br />
<br />
And I was like "hmmmm. I do, do that, don't I?"<br />
<br />
And he says, "Yep, and as long as you keep eating her delicious shit sandwiches, she's going to keep on serving them to you." <br />
<br />
And that was that. <br />
<br />
<br />
Shit!!! I don't like shit sandwiches at ALL. But you would never have guessed it because he was correct... I was being served GOURMET SHIT SANDWICHES at an alarming rate for the past several years, and I DID complain. I bitched and moaned and griped and complained, but I ate them, time and time again. I can't tell you how many times I threatened not to eat those damn things anymore, but I have a laundry list of reasons (excuses) why I'd give in and belly up to the shit sandwich buffet, and people... I am proud to say I am now happily living a Shit Sandwich free life. <br />
<br />
You would think it would be fairly easy to stop eating shit sandwiches, but sometimes it just isn't. Sometimes you worry about the people you love who are also eating those same shit sandwiches. So coming to terms with the fact that the other shit sandwich eaters are old enough to make their own decisions and suffer their own consequences was a necessary component in the plan to go Shit Sandwich free. (And It took a few extra sandwiches to get that point to sink in, trust me!)<br />
<br />
And now... things will probably be looking a little different to some folks in my life, and I'm sure they will be misconstrued, and misunderstood as usual, however, I know that I have done the right thing. I have never withheld love from the people who mean the world to me. I've worn it on my sleeve, I've proclaimed it to the world, I've given them everything I can and expected NOTHING in return. I will never stop doing these things... so I<b> stopped feeling guilty</b> for wanting to walk away from the bullshit. I stopped feeling guilty for leaving someone I love more than life in a spot where it probably feels like they have to fend for themselves with no support, because I know in my heart that person knows I'll always be there for him. I stopped feeling guilty for knowing that if I turned my back on the bullshit I'm taking the risk of losing contact with some other beautiful things in my life, and that was probably the hardest thing... but I know the universe unfolds as it should, and I know I wasn't doing any favors for the people I love by being a phony shit sandwich eater. <br />
<br />
And one thing has become very, very clear. When you get tired of something that makes you feel bad you really can wake up one day and decide to change it. You have the power to do that, and it really is THAT EASY. <br />
<br />
So, do you have someone serving up shit sandwiches in your life? Think about it! ;)<br />
<br />
<br />
Thank you brother, for giving me the most useful advice I've heard in a good while. And delivering it in a way that I can share it zebra style! You're the best. <br />
<br />
<br />Sharonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01787533894158910251noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3608632426249843683.post-56687853282384177362014-04-16T00:46:00.000-07:002014-04-16T00:46:26.637-07:00I forgot I had a defibrillator (& other dumb things I've done recently)<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEis8SbyzVgBDdzAgS1Q_7ArEb1te9Mp244XjedE1Jah4Eg7UAuZhMONhCHzkVw6wpuAVdI7FHQ5Xn9Hb074nyIsdc0Te8NjLHclkiO3y_AmUkNgMotTNoWd8bAl3h59873_5ELUpmraSTd_/s1600/zap.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEis8SbyzVgBDdzAgS1Q_7ArEb1te9Mp244XjedE1Jah4Eg7UAuZhMONhCHzkVw6wpuAVdI7FHQ5Xn9Hb074nyIsdc0Te8NjLHclkiO3y_AmUkNgMotTNoWd8bAl3h59873_5ELUpmraSTd_/s1600/zap.jpg" /></a></div>
<h3>
*** It took me a day or two, but I found the funny in it ..... *** (Still not sleeping well, but that'll come!) </h3>
<br />
<br />
<br />
Well, it's official. I've joined the "Bless Her Heart" ranks in the
highest degree possible. You know the ones... the members of these
ranks get told "Bless your heart" a lot, right to their face... and
while being discussed by others who see the problem you would see a lot
of slow, shaking heads, and hear a lot of "ohhh bless her heart"...
sometimes even in unison! What they really mean when this statement is
made (at least most of the time) is "She ain't right", or sometimes "
"That poor thing, there's not much hope for her is there?, and also very
often these words might mean " That one's a special kind of stupid
isn't she?" LOL! <br />
<br />
Before I tell you my latest Bless Your Heart Moment, let me give you a quick background.<br />
I was diagnosed with Sarcoidosis in
2008. My diagnosis, came after an original
diagnosis of stage 4 metastatic disease... cancer... less than six
months to live... not much hope... "you've got to get your shit together
cause your expiration date has been handed to you"..... <br />
<br />
Two months into my expiration day journey I had a burning need to find a
doctor who would do a biopsy on my just so I could get a name for this
cancer that was about to devour me for a meal.... they said it was
everywhere, but I figured it had to start somewhere... there had to be a
primary spot.. and oldest tumor SOMETHING to be able t give it a name.
I wanted to know what to call it. I had a bone to pick with it. I
asked my oncologist about the biopsy, and he said "Why do you want a
biopsy? You already know you have cancer" And I simply said I needed to
address it by name. He fought me on it for a few hours, but finally
consented to take me up to the computer room and have a look at my PET
scan... the one that prompted 4 other doctors to confirm the cancer
diagnosis. And so we went.. and looked... and discussed... and by the
time my questions had all been asked, he was convinced a biopsy was in
order as well... and I will just say from here, to shorten the story...
within ten days I had had a biopsy, and a whole new name for my monster.
Diagnosis: Sarcoidosis. And it's been up and down and up and down,
but for the past almost 2 years, a lot more ups than downs. I've been
feeling fantastic! I've dropped tons of weight, I've gained back energy
that I was certain was gone forever, I've become 100% more active, back
to really living this life I love, playing with grand children...
enjoying my photography more than ever before, and LIFE. IS. GOOD.
So good, in fact, that I really tend to forget that I've got an
insidious disease that can rear its ugly head in unexpected moments, and
Sunday, this is what happened:<br />
<br />
My youngest grandchild Addlee Laine turned four on the 9th and her
birthday party was at the skating rink on Sunday. There I was doing my
thing... you know... barefoot with the babies in the bounce houses they
have all around the skate floor! I had just sent a little one down the
slide to her momma waiting at the bottom and started sliding down
myself. About half way down the slide I'm blind. Pure white lightning
flash in my eyes, body lifted up from the slide a few inches, and I'm
thinking "OH MY GOD, there's a loose electrical wire on this thing and I
just found it with my butt!! They need to shut this thing down and fix
it. And I stood up at the bottom and "BOOM WHITE LIGHTNING FLASH,
Somebody's freakin horse kicked me in the chest from the .... INSIDE?
OUCH DAMMIT! Oh HELL. That was my defibrillator. SHIT! I rub my
eyes cause everything is a little blurry... spot my two older kids and
my parents and head their way. WHITE FLASH AGAIN... BOOM GOSHDAMN HORSE
KICKIN PIECE OF... and I hear a yell... a LOUD Yelll. Oh my god that
was me yelling... shit. I caught my breath and my mom's attention as
well as my youngest son and screamed CALL 911 my defibrillator keeps
firing and about tha time WHITE LIGHT BOOM HORSE pos what did I ever
do to that horse damn! And my dad is at my side holding me up, trying
to get me to a safe place to OMG WHITE LIGHT BAM BAM HORSE SHIT.... the
Shit was my dad. He got shocked tooo. But he never let go. Still
walking to the side bench and just before we get there ahhhhhh WHITE
LIGHT BAAAAAM!! HORSE a;nd MAYBE A DONKEY TOO this time. and Dad feeling
it again... Dad I"m so sorry. <br />
<br />
A really nice lady I don't know helps me take my pulse until the
Ambulance crew gets there. She calms me down. Soon the Paramedics
arrive, hook me up, My mom goes to my office for me to grab my wires
transmitter so I can fix my defibrillator journal to the docs in
Colorado, the paramedics are watching, watching, and waiting... no more
shocks, but it took a good hour to stabilize my very high blood pressure
and very fast heart rate. And I was grateful, and emotional, and
terrified for the first time in 4 years of my defibrillator, and a
little loopy, pretty exhausted, and praying that all was caused from a
malfunctioning defibrillator... which didn't turn out to be the case.
Spent much of the evening up at the hospital while they got things
documented, and started me on heart meds for the first time in my life.
My doctor called me this morning from Denver and they are setting up
the National Jewish Lab Rat Maze (that's what I call the testing times
when I have to go there lol) and will be calling soon with dates. <br />
<br />
I was feeling so good. I didn't even remember that I had a
defibrillator... Every test I've had in over 2 years was awesome. Last
time I was there, the little one (my name Sarc doctor's nickname cause
she's petite and adorable and reminds me of a lit stick of dynamite)
told me she didn't want to say I was in remission, but I was as close as
I'd ever been and she felt okay with not rescheduling an appointment for
awhile, so I didn't... and promised her I would call if I needed to.
And that was that. About six months or so ago, my defibrillator
downloads to Colorado were still showing lots of short runs of Vtach,
but they were kind of letting me be the guide on it all. I wasn't
having any episodes that were making me dizzy, nauseated, light headed,
or weak. While I could sometimes feel fluttering, it ever lasted too
long, and I didn't feel that I needed to be concerned with it at all I
have the downloads every three months, and a checkup once a year. Guess
that will all be changing. I guess my whole point here is this:<br />
<br />
I believe in living my life. And I don't regret ANY of the way I have
that since my diagnosis. And I think I'm even okay with the fact that I
did forget my defibrillator too. Because I don't want that damn thing
to define me... even thought that's pretty much exactly what it's done
for the past 48 hours.. But in general, No. Most people don't know I've
got one. I"m not ashamed of it by any stretch of the imagination... I
just don't use it for an excuse, or a reason not to be normal.... and of
course the downside of all that is... you think you've slid your butt across a loose, live electrical wire on a bouncy house slide before you
remember it's just you and your Thumper. I issued a letter of apology
to all of the parents at the birthday party for upstaging their event
for awhile and forcing them to have to answer questions from their
little birthday party goers.... "Mommy What was wrong with that lady
making those noises with fire coming out of her ears?" Just kidding on
the fire... but there might have been smoke... just sayin. Sharonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01787533894158910251noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3608632426249843683.post-52610039087724848982014-01-15T23:04:00.000-08:002014-01-15T23:04:26.206-08:00Itches and Lumps and Things I'm Sure of <div>
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgyQBF9aIN_VmpAnY8C-r-MQ3fKrM04B1lcrSdBSI9BSz_9o_atWT8rLMAXnZv3fm4hwEfcGd7iqAoIxnL15qFa9JIX0U7kJ1hsLD3H6fMOjWQ2BrJGxOW8GkCsy1T5rP31lGzHKSgUicZ6/s1600/I+Love+This+Crazy+Life.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgyQBF9aIN_VmpAnY8C-r-MQ3fKrM04B1lcrSdBSI9BSz_9o_atWT8rLMAXnZv3fm4hwEfcGd7iqAoIxnL15qFa9JIX0U7kJ1hsLD3H6fMOjWQ2BrJGxOW8GkCsy1T5rP31lGzHKSgUicZ6/s1600/I+Love+This+Crazy+Life.jpg" height="145" width="400" /></a></div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<br /></div>
One minute I'm scratching a persistent itch under my right arm, blink, and there I am in a doctor's office half naked discussing that damn lump and inverted nipples. So.... how was your day? <br />
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Sometimes my life is too weird for words. Seriously... I'm a writer (yes I do throw that title around very loosely thank you very much!) and I'm not sure I could make up more convoluted stories to write than those that are my own reality! </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
So, I've found myself (yet again) in that place where one or two unanswered questions threaten to own me. Okay <b>A)</b> Rough patches make me <i style="font-weight: bold;">extremely </i>quick to figure out how I'm going to get beyond them. and<b> B) </b>Every rough patch I've been through (and there's quite a few that qualify as rough) has made me a little smarter, a little crazier, and a LOT stronger by the time I've kicked its ass. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
SO I'm thinking "this limbo thing is ridiculous" and at that moment I decided to NEVER be willingly consumed by things I can not control again. My way of dealing with the unanswered questions tonight is to remember the things I am absolutely sure of, and writing them has been humbling. How could I ever forget that the things I am sure of are so much more important than the unanswered questions regardless of what those answers might mean. Without further adieu this is what I know:</div>
<div>
<ol>
<li>I am the most blessed person I know. I hope you are the most blessed person you know, too. </li>
<li>I would be lost if my life were not crazy, chaotic, uncertain, and unpredictable </li>
<li>I've always been able to embrace change regardless of where it occurred in my world. I know that isn't true for many people, and I consider this one of the greatest blessings in my life simply because I have never been paralyzed by fear when I've had to deal with life changing events. </li>
<li>I know who God is. Seriously. We've met. We talk. We laugh. I don't care if you don't believe me. Some of you know what I'm about to say is true, some of you will write me off as the loon you always figured I was and stop reading right after you read the next sentence.</li>
<li>God is absolutely, positively indefinable by any source, ANY. Not a church, not a book, not an organization, not your momma, your gramma or your Uncle Homer. And if you're trying to know a definable God, you are sooo missing out!! </li>
<li>Attitude is more than half of any battle and I have proof.</li>
<li>Family has absolutely nothing to do with blood and biology (THANK GOD!) </li>
<li>Miracles come wrapped in difficult, scary and sometimes very ugly paper. Knowing this will help you to see miracles that most everyone misses, and recognizing miracles can, and will change your life in beautiful, unexplainable ways. </li>
<li>There is always, yes ALWAYS something to laugh at in every situation if we are willing to look for it. Laughter is the best possible way to get through the darkest, ugliest, and scariest parts of life without falling apart. AND......lastly....</li>
<li>The universe unfolds as it should. </li>
</ol>
<div>
There. Perspective is a beautiful thing isn't it?<br />
By the end of the week (I hope) I should be able to add a couple more things to the list I just made. No matter what those things turn out to be, I will find a way to be grateful for them, and THAT is how I know I will be<b> giving</b> the ass kicking rather than<b> getting</b> one if the results of these tests are less than optimal.<br />
And now I've got to go see a certain sandman about some sleep I seem to have lost. <br />
If you've got an extra prayer you could send up on my behalf I'd be grateful! Thanks for stopping by! </div>
</div>
Sharonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01787533894158910251noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3608632426249843683.post-88934890160493514212014-01-09T23:34:00.000-08:002014-01-09T23:48:56.073-08:00Polishing Turds (Revisited) Grabbed this one out of hiding and dusted it off a bit... it fit today for reasons that I won't bore you with, but it was a good reminder for me and mentally a good place to get to... maybe you remember it, maybe not so much. Either way, I believe it's a timeless concept ~ When I wrote the original (and a little different) I was in a different frame of mind, and today as I re- read it, it brought a whole different thought process to a completely different scenario ~ enjoy. <br />
<br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Verdana, Geneva, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">Life is hard sometimes. But I tend to do a good job of making it twice as hard as it needs to be on a pretty regular basis. I over-think everything. I analyze the crap out of the most ridiculous things. I'm very good at making a mountain out of a molehill when it does the least amount of good, and sometimes the greatest amount of damage. Welcome to my emotionally charged day! :D </span><br />
<br style="background-color: white; font-family: Verdana, Geneva, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;" />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Verdana, Geneva, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">There's a very fine line between being jaded/suspicious and being cautious about who you decide to let into your personal world, and that line has been crossed and re-crossed so many times in my life I lost count. I'm still learning that one, and in the process I've been burned a time or two. I'm still trying to sort out the lessons, which are inevitable as well, and lead me to believe that the people in our lives aren't completely our own choice. God sends people in to teach us, bless us, and love us. And one might tend to think that when God sends someone to us they must be a highly trusted and stellar individual. Why wouldn't we? But in my experience, the truth has been a bit warped in comparison to the ideal. Sometimes they're not a pleasant experience by any stretch of the imagination. Sometimes they make us look like fools. But ALWAYS they are sent to teach us something, and hopefully you will read the rest of this with that thought in mind. </span><br />
<br style="background-color: white; font-family: Verdana, Geneva, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;" />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Verdana, Geneva, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">For several years </span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: Verdana, Geneva, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"> now I have been trying to spray the dirt and crap off of what I thought might be a true gem. I have continually come up empty handed, but I am having a hard time walking away. </span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: Verdana, Geneva, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"> Hmmm. what is the definition of </span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: Verdana, Geneva, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"> insanity again? Oh yeah.. to continue to do the same things over and over again, expecting different results.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Verdana, Geneva, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Verdana, Geneva, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"> Are you familiar with the term "Polishing a Turd"? I used to have a friend who was a turd polisher.</span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: Verdana, Geneva, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"> Yep, that's what I call her. In fact, that's what she calls herself. She can take a piece of crap be it a house, furniture, car, or human being and polish it up so that it looks amazing. Now all of that is awesome when it comes to the non human things. But not so much when the humans come in to play. Sometimes a turd is a turd no matter how much you scrub it up.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Verdana, Geneva, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">My particular turd isn't ever going to change. I think I can see that rather clearly right now. So where to go from here? Learn to love this turd you say? Hmm. I already do love it. That's part of the problem. Not a deep love like the way I love my boyfriend, or my children... </span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: Verdana, Geneva, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"> more like a very naughty pet. You love the pet, you couldn't take it to the pound for anything. But much of the time (at least every other day) </span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: Verdana, Geneva, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">you wish it was the neighbor's pet or maybe belonged to someone that lived across town. </span><br />
<br style="background-color: white; font-family: Verdana, Geneva, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;" />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Verdana, Geneva, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">I think what I'm supposed to do here is change the way I see the turd. I'm casting it in a very negative light for sure. Perhaps I need to give it less significance in my life while still acknowledging that it needs to be here. I'm not sure, but pounding it out on the blog helps a little. I can see that I'm the one who needs to make the change. I'm pretty sure the turd doesn't mind things the way they are at all..... As always~ thanks for stopping by!</span>Sharonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01787533894158910251noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3608632426249843683.post-46611212440720260432014-01-06T05:50:00.000-08:002014-01-06T05:52:15.688-08:00Things that rhyme with GRUDGE<br />
<br />
Humans hold grudges. Some humans hold on to grudges as if they might win a prize if they refuse to give them up. Why we do things to ourselves that keep us unbalanced is more of a mystery to me than the secret of life.<br />
<br />
I'm not a grudge holder... at least, I don't hold one for very long. But I'm interested in all of the reasons why someone might find themselves attached to a grudge, or all of their grudges. And while I'm certain there are as many reasons for doing so as there are kinds of grudges, those reasons can be boiled down to exactly..... two.<br />
<br />
1. If I let go of this grudge, I'm telling the world that I condone the person/behavior that caused me to feel the grudge in the first place.<br />
<br />
2. Forgiving a grudge = weakness<br />
<br />
Two reasons that make the slightest bit of sense, and honestly, that's a stretch. To me, they don't make any sense at all. BUT.... humans are hard to figure out. I think this is more related to personality type than anything else, but I will probably never know for sure. This is how I see it though:<br />
<br />
Someone (a very WISE someone) once said "Holding a grudge is like swallowing poison and hoping the other person dies.) And THIS makes sense to me.<br />
I've tried holding a grudge, and I've held grudges for a short time without trying too. I think it's human to get angry with people for whatever reason and not want to forgive the action that caused that anger to happen. But guess what? Staying angry with someone isn't hurting them even a fraction as much as it's hurting you. THEY aren't losing sleep over it. Perhaps they did once, or twice, but after that, trust me, they had better things to do. YOU, however, have lost more than a few nights rest because of that grudge. You, in your new quest to stand your ground, to rise against the injustice that has been done are going to hold this grudge til death. THAT will let them know just how much you disapprove of what they did. Because YOU are right, and they are wrong and letting it go just can not ever happen. So hold on til death you will.... and it may not take as long as you thought. <br />
<br />
You are poisoning yourself. Plain and simple. I bet if you've held a grudge for longer than say... ohhh.... a few months, that you have already got health issues that you don't know about. You've gained or lost unhealthy amounts of weight. You're suffering from at least one or two stress related issues. Blood pressure high? Stomach issues ongoing? Cant poop right? (sorry, but it happens). Find yourself short tempered? Shaky? Head hurt a lot? Going to see the chiropractor more than you used to? Can't concentrate? Got CRS? Uh huh... Sure. go ahead and blame it on your age, your job, your genes, the weather.... but if you are holding a grudge... blame that first. <br />
<br />
And guess what else? It's not just affecting you. It's affecting the people who love you too. A lot. Trust me, they get it. They may not agree with you or feel the same anger to the same degree as you do, but they understand human nature. They will sympathize with you for awhile, perhaps offer you their time and ear for your complaints, frustrations, tears.... but after awhile grudge holders get really hard to live with. and soon enough, they either let go, or find more like minded people to spend time with. NOT GOOD!! Why? Because not only does misery love company... but miserable company will feed your unhealthy grudge holding like sugar feeds cancer And honestly, after a few months of grudge holding... you might as well have cancer Incurable cancer in fact, because after holding a grudge for too long I'm not sure if it's possible to really let it go. It becomes a part of who you are. It becomes a very ugly, hard to watch part of who you are. and it will kill you.... painfully... without mercy. It. Will. Kill you. <br />
<br />
You have told yourself that you can't simply let go. You're convinced. But you've fed yourself a lie, and deep inside you know it. You're a person who has been wronged dammit, and it's an injustice that can not be forgiven, and SHOULD NOT be forgiven by anyone. Period!! Sorry. You're wrong. But not only are you wrong, you're giving the people who love you and the world around you so little credit that it's insulting!! You think those who love you will think you've dropped your standards. You think you'll be judged. You think you'll appear weak and that someone or maybe even EVERYONE will think you now condone the behavior that had you holding that grudge... they were right, you were wrong... and if you can read this and still feel that holding a grudge is worth it, then you're probably a lifer and can't be convinced. You're already dying because of the grudges toxicity, and you don't even know it. <br />
Here's something else you might not know.... Forgiveness isn't for someone else. Forgiveness is for YOU. When we forgive someone, we don't have to announce it. We don't have to tell them, or anyone else. We just do it. Forgiveness doesn't mean we forget either, in case you wondered. You could pretend to forget it if made you feel better, but I think people who say they forgive AND forget are full of crap. we forgive because we are human. We forgive because no matter how mad we are and no matter how well we think we know someone, we have no idea why they do what they do. We forgive because if we choose not to, we sit in judgment of them, and in doing so announce to the world that we are better than that person we choose not to forgive. And that, is just sad. Forgiveness doesn't mean we have to go back to the way things were before we were hurt, or someone we love was hurt. It doesn't mean we have to pretend like nothing happened. It simply means we refuse to be poisoned by hatred and we refuse to die to a desire to look or feel superior to another human regardless of how bad we hate what they did. And in spite of what you've told yourself, forgiveness is not impossible. It's not even difficult. Be human, get mad, get angry, feel hurt, and then let it go. Let God figure out how justice gets served... let karma do its thing, because it will and neither karma nor God need our help. And if you get to witness God, or karma or the Universe rain some hell down upon the one who hurt you it's not un-human to feel a little satisfaction, and it's not un-human to feel a little guilt either. But dwelling on either of those things will keep you so unbalanced that you may have a skewed view of happiness as a result, and thats just the beginning of why it's not good. <br />
<br />
Don't let me tell you what to do. But if you need to forgive someone for something why not do it and get on with the business of living your life? You owe it to yourself don't you think? Sharonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01787533894158910251noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3608632426249843683.post-18807278587814009342014-01-05T00:31:00.001-08:002014-01-05T00:45:14.690-08:00I'm Late & You're not Surprised!Here we are already 5 days into 2014, and I haven't done anything remotely close to a goal setting blog post. Maybe that's because I'm not really a goal setter, or a resolution maker, but I am certainly a blogger, and maybe I write to see myself write, to hear myself think, to see my soul poured out... and maybe I'm just a poser and not a blogger after all... but I feel like I should at least put something out there in writing so I can either feel good and guilty when I read it in six months and it's nothing close to what I'm doing, or I can pat myself on the back because I'm well on my way or even done with whatever I'm going to put on this currently mostly blank page. (Can you tell I have no idea what I'm going to say yet?) :) It's okay, I'm absolutely okay with that. I wish I had a dollar for every time I had no clue what I was going to write before I produce a fabulous piece of work! But alas, nobody really wants to pay me for such things, and it's a crying shame if you ask me.... <br />
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Yeah... I've got nothin, at least nothing in the goal setting realm. I DO, however, have this Guiness stuff on my shoulders... Guinness.. the goofy, lovable dingus dog that we can't help but love. He's the long eared sad eyed bloodhound that will be entertaining children (even if it's only my own grand children) and their adult counterparts (even if that's only me and MY children) just as soon as my brain cracks open and gives me the flow of words I'm needing to write the stories that are in there. Writer's block is a fancy word for "I've got it all in my head but there's something clogging the hole it's supposed to come out of...." that's what it feels like anyway. MENTAL CONSTIPATION! There's a visual. Ummm no. Don't visualize...<br />
<br />
Okay.. I can always spout off rhymes... I'm SO not a poet! But whoever cam up with 'bust a rhyme' in the rap realm got it right! I can definitely bust a rhyme... <br />
<br />
Guinness woke up early<br />
on a day when I could sleep<br />
He didn't care to wait<br />
for my alarm to start to beep<br />
<br />
He tried to wake the other dogs<br />
But they ignored his whine<br />
The numbers on my bedside clock<br />
Said it was FIVE OH NINE.<br />
<br />
I tried to whisper quietly<br />
And patted his soft head<br />
Instead he heard "It's time to play"<br />
And jumped up on the bed<br />
<br />
The cat freaked out and swung a claw<br />
connecting with his ear<br />
A big surprise to Guinness<br />
who reacted out of fear<br />
<br />
His big old paw came down<br />
and trapped the kitty by the tail<br />
The sounds ensuing woke the house<br />
And neighborhood as well<br />
<br />
The cat flew off the bed<br />
and out the doorway to the hall<br />
and Guinness right behind him<br />
jumped and flew into the wall<br />
<br />
I know that cat was smirking<br />
In his eye the slightest gleam<br />
Guinness laid right down and closed his eyes<br />
Like it had been a dream<br />
<br />
I wish I could have done that too<br />
But I just scratched my head<br />
No sleeping now I'm wide awake<br />
at FIVE FIFTEEN instead.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yep... just another Guinness antic to start the weekend off with a bang! Jeeez, I should write a book....;)<br />
<br /></div>
Sharonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01787533894158910251noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3608632426249843683.post-47103009010762736462013-12-31T21:53:00.002-08:002014-01-01T20:36:38.302-08:00The Small Print<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<br /></blockquote>
</blockquote>
<div class="text" colspan="2" id="entry_7024891" style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 1.8; padding: 5px 15px 10px 30px;">
<div class="definition">
<span style="font-size: 12px; line-height: 1.8;">Finding out you are a zebra isn't really as shocking as it might sound, even though it's not something that gradually happens. It's one of those things that happens basically overnight. Seriously. I went to bed one night and I wasn't a zebra. I woke up the next day and I still wasn't a zebra, but by the time I went to bed that night guess what? Yep. Zebra extraordinaire. Okay. I'll explain.... actually, I'll let Wikipedia explain. They do an excellent job:</span><br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<b style="color: black; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19.1875px;">Zebra</b><span style="color: black; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19.1875px;"> is the </span><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Medical_slang" style="background-image: none; color: #0b0080; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19.1875px; text-decoration: none;" title="Medical slang">medical slang</a><span style="color: black; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19.1875px;"> for arriving at an exotic </span><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Medical_diagnosis" style="background-image: none; color: #0b0080; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19.1875px; text-decoration: none;" title="Medical diagnosis">medical diagnosis</a><span style="color: black; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19.1875px;"> when a more commonplace explanation is more likely.</span><sup class="reference" id="cite_ref-1" style="color: black; font-family: sans-serif; line-height: 1em; unicode-bidi: -webkit-isolate;"><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zebra_(medicine)#cite_note-1" style="background-image: none; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; color: #0b0080; text-decoration: none; white-space: nowrap;">[1]</a></sup><span style="color: black; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19.1875px;"> It is shorthand for the </span><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aphorism" style="background-image: none; color: #0b0080; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19.1875px; text-decoration: none;" title="Aphorism">aphorism</a><span style="color: black; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19.1875px;"> coined in the late 1940s by Dr. </span><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Theodore_Woodward" style="background-image: none; color: #0b0080; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19.1875px; text-decoration: none;" title="Theodore Woodward">Theodore Woodward</a><span style="color: black; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19.1875px;">, professor at the </span><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/University_of_Maryland,_Baltimore" style="background-image: none; color: #0b0080; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19.1875px; text-decoration: none;" title="University of Maryland, Baltimore">University of Maryland</a><span style="color: black; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19.1875px;"> School of Medicine, who instructed his </span><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Internship_(medicine)" style="background-image: none; color: #0b0080; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19.1875px; text-decoration: none;" title="Internship (medicine)">medical interns</a><span style="color: black; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19.1875px;">: "When you hear hoofbeats, think of horses not zebras".</span><sup class="reference" id="cite_ref-2" style="color: black; font-family: sans-serif; line-height: 1em; unicode-bidi: -webkit-isolate;"><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zebra_(medicine)#cite_note-2" style="background-image: none; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; color: #0b0080; text-decoration: none; white-space: nowrap;">[2]</a></sup><span style="color: black; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19.1875px;"> Since horses are common in Maryland while zebras are relatively rare, logically one could confidently guess that an animal making hoofbeats is probably a horse. By 1960, the aphorism was widely known in medical circles.</span></blockquote>
<br />
My doctor, explained this to me on the day that he discovered that I didn't have terminal cancer after all... (yeah, I was diagnosed and even given an expected expiration date. Well.. not an exact date, but the actual wording was: "less than six months", aaaaand that story isn't really all that relevant here except that I got the horse label, rather than the zebra label initially) And since that day I have discovered that those of us who are lucky enough (yep, I said it! I'm so very lucky!) to realize we are zebras have found a kinship/brotherhood/sisterhood/ because of it. A great many of us are proud of our zebra status because we know that by the time we were zebras we had all been changed mentally, physically, and emotionally by whatever diagnosis we got before the one that turned us into zebras. I, for one, am a completely different person from my own journey. I know many others who will readily agree<br />
<br />
Maybe you have heard the saying: " What doesn't kill us makes us stronger". I am here to tell you that for me, that is absolute truth. And in the process of "getting stronger" I have learned to look at life and all it holds in a completely different light. I have seen things more clearly than I ever thought possible, I have figured out the meaning of things that weren't important enough to give a second thought to before, but now mean more to me and my happiness than I could have imagined.<br />
None of this rambling means that I know the meaning of life, nor do I have knowledge that will keep me from avoiding death and taxes (the only two unavoidable things in life near as I can tell lol) I won't stay young forever, nor do I have the secrets to wealth and fortune. I just have had the rare experience of being told I had less than six months to live, of looking death square in the face and coming to terms with it on my own, of sitting down with a "Five Wishes" booklet in front of me completing the answers to questions that will dictate the way the last days and hours of my life should play out, and then of hearing the words "It's not cancer, and if you die in the next six months THIS probably isn't going to be to blame. But every one of those things I just listed have already completely changed my life in profound ways. All of this, in my far from humble opinion, has given me the opportunity to share "the way I see life" with people who's stories coincide with mine, or people who ask me how I can find hope in a hopeless situation, and people who wonder how I can see so many blessings through it all. Life has given me a unique perspective, and a desire to share it whenever I can. In the eye of my slightly over inflated ego I've got a unique psychology to share.<br />
And because I like to name things... (& people, & places, give nicknames... you name it) I call it Zebra Psychology.<br />
<br />
<br /></div>
<div class="definition">
<span style="font-size: 12px; line-height: 1.8;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="definition">
<span style="font-size: 12px; line-height: 1.8;">So there it is. Zebra Psychology defined. Yes, you should assume that this blog will be silly and whimsical. And sometimes it will be serious and sad, and ticked off and real. I write for many reasons, but possibly the most important is to analyze and deal with the people, places and things in my world as I experience them, and just as often to help those same folks understand me a little better also. I'm not sure why I feel I need to explain this blog's existence, but if you are here reading it's likely that while it's brand new I have invited you to do so, and it is my hope that it somehow speaks to you, blesses you, entertains you, or helps you know who I am. And if it makes you laugh, or scratch your head and wonder what the heck I'm laughing at, trying to say or complaining about, well that's even better. </span></div>
<div class="definition">
<span style="font-size: 12px; line-height: 1.8;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="definition">
This is the small print of Zebra Psychology. Welcome to my heart, poured out for your reading pleasure. I Thank you from the top to the bottom of my crazy, nerdy, not right zebra striped heart!<br />
Thanks for stopping by! :) </div>
<div class="definition">
<br /></div>
<div class="definition">
<br /></div>
<div class="definition">
<br /></div>
<div class="definition">
<br /></div>
</div>
Sharonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01787533894158910251noreply@blogger.com6